First Christmas

Lately I have felt twinges of sadness when I am out running errands and I see all of the Baby’s First Christmas paraphernalia. Please understand that I am not in any way upset about the fact that Amelia was here last Christmas. Not at all! I know that God’s timing is perfect, and that Amelia was born precisely when He intended. It’s just that last Christmas, she was two days old. Her birth was a surprise. Amelia arrived right when I had planned on leaving my job. After leaving the library I was supposed to have more than a month to organize her room, clean the house, read about labor and newborn care, and simply prepare myself for the changes heading my way.

I must admit that when motherhood was thrust upon me sooner than I expected, I was more than a little shell shocked. Last Christmas is a blur. Thank goodness we have pictures, or I’m sure I wouldn’t remember any of it! Amelia was brand new last Christmas. She was still trying to make sense of the world. She was here, but she was really just a sweet, tiny, soft, sleeping bundle with a bright orange face. We didn’t know her, and she didn’t know us. We were thrilled, though, and incredibly thankful that she was healthy and at home with us.

Yesterday afternoon I realized that although this year will technically be Amelia’s second Christmas, it will be her first “real” Christmas. We know our daughter now, and she knows us. Amelia is definitely not a neon orange glowworm anymore – she is a bright blue-eyed, energetic, loving, joyful, mischievous, smart, funny and all-around precious little girl. This year will be our first Christmas truly knowing Amelia. As a family of three, we will decorate our tree, sing Christmas carols, read the Christmas story and start our own family traditions. We will bake pepper cookies and eat rice porridge and drive around in our PJ’s looking at Christmas lights.

It’ll be a great first Christmas.

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