Child of My Heart

On Monday night Amelia didn’t wake up to nurse. Normally she wakes up once or twice crying for her pacifier, and then again around 3:30 to nurse. Monday night though, she woke up for her pacifier but then slept straight through until it was time to get up. Wow! Very unexpected! She did it again on Tuesday night, and I figured that she was phasing out her middle-of-the-night nursing session completely. (Her pediatrician told me at her nine month appointment that I could stop nursing her at night, but I decided to just follow her cues and see what happened. She only nurses for ten minutes, max, and always goes right back to sleep, so it wasn’t like we were staying up for hours in the middle of the night.)

Last night as she was nursing before going to bed, I started crying at the thought of not nursing her at night. Yes, for the first two nights I was excited about the prospect of not having to get out of bed at night, but then I realized how much I would miss cuddling with my baby.

Mark gave me this Willow Tree figurine for Christmas. It is incredibly precious to me, because this is exactly how I cuddle with Amelia once she finishes nursing at night. It is the ONLY time of the day or night that she is still enough for me to cuddle. I love her vibrant personality and her amazing energy, but she is always moving. During the day she hardly ever wants to sit down, much less cuddle!

After our middle-of-the-night nursing sessions, I sit in the glider and just hold Amelia close. She lays her head on my shoulder and drifts back to her dreams. Sometimes, I will sit with her for quite some time, savoring the feel of her snuggled close to me. I just need a few more of those cuddles! When Amelia woke up at 5:15 this morning, I went into her room and nursed her even though she didn’t need to nurse. She didn’t need to, but I did.

I don’t know how many more nighttime cuddles I will get, but I will make sure that I cherish each and every one. My baby is growing up! Thank you Mark, for the beautiful Willow Tree figurine. It is a perfect addition to our collection, and because of the memories it invokes, it will always hold a special place in my heart.